This week I found out that the most recent MRI scan picked up a recurrence of breast cancer metastases in the same area of my brain (cerebellum) that was affected nearly 2 years ago – so I’ll be having Cyberknife targeted radiotherapy treatment again.
Last time, the treatment was both straightforward and successful. Recovery took a long time, though, because the tumours had already affected my balance considerably, before treatment began. At times I doubted whether I would ever be able to leave the house, because I felt so exhausted and unsteady on my feet.
This time I’m not displaying significant symptoms – although, on a good day, my balance is only about 90% back to normal since the last episode – and I am expecting recovery to be much easier. Only time will tell…
Although it’s tempting to replay the negative images from last time, and imagine the worst, that’s not what my philosophy is about. I decided long ago that it’s never worth worrying about what “might” or “might not” be.
So when the negative images float through my brain, I simply acknowledge them and let them go, reminding myself that “past performance may not be indicative of future results” as investment companies like to remind us.
And I keep my focus on things I enjoy and am grateful for. After all, I’ve been here before.
I’ve been trying to get as much walking exercise as possible, because my balance will be better if my legs are strong. One day I caught the bus to my old stomping ground of Wimbledon.
Over 30 years ago, before I met hubby, I lived in a freezing cold bedsit close to the centre of Wimbledon and the train / tube station. At the top of my road there was a path leading up to Wimbledon Village and Wimbledon Common, so I was able to enjoy the best of both worlds.
On this visit I wanted to find a more interesting café where I could meet friends for a cup of tea. We have a very pleasant café in New Malden, where I often meet up with one friend – but I prefer to travel a bit further afield, if I can, especially if my friends are already coming a long way to see me.
The problem with Wimbledon, though, is that it’s a town of two halves: the town centre, and the Village.
Wimbledon Village is quaint, and there are a number of chic and interesting cafés – but you have to climb a big hill to get to the Village (or catch the bus), so it adds to the journey time.
Wimbledon town, on the other hand, is… well, quite honestly, it’s a bit drab. Which is surprising, because the house prices are astronomical (although not as high as in the Village) and it has good links to London. So I walked quite a long way to find a suitable venue.
The best café I found in the town was The Sound Lounge, pictured above, where they serve vegan treats and have live music in the evenings. It felt quite hippie and reminded me of cafés I used to frequent as a student in France in the 70s… But it’s a pop-up café, so I don’t even know whether it will be there next time I visit!